How to choose your boudoir outfit
Keeping a broader definition of boudoir really opens up the outfit options for your session — lingerie being just one of many. What else can you wear, and how do you decide? How do you narrow it down? I wanted to write a lil bit to help you with this.
Ask yourself:
If you’re not sure where to start, ask yourself: when do I feel confident and sexy? When do I feel confident but not necessarily sexy?
The answer to either question can be worked into the outfits you choose.
Feel sexy and confident at the gym? Consider working in your best set of athleisure during your session.
Feel sexy when you roller-skate in the park on the weekend? We can roll with that.
Or in a sundress on a summer weekend?
Or in just your underwear around the house? Which set?
Feel super confident at work? What do you do? Maybe we incorporate some corporate wear dom energy.
Feel sexy on the trail? Let’s go out there. Never set foot outside? Maybe add it to the maybe list.
You should feel a connection to the clothes you wear! Familiarity can boost confidence. On the flipside, the stress-free, judgement-free nature of your session makes it the perfect time to experiment with something you’ve always wanted to wear.
A metaphor from movies
Imagine your boudoir session is a movie, and you’re the lead actor.
The next scene you’re in is a steamy one — lots of flirting, sexual tension, eye contact.
As the director, I ask you well before shooting starts what outfit you think your character would be wearing — of all the choices available, in what outfit would you feel most confident in in this scene? What would make you feel so sexy and confident wearing it that portraying someone sexy and confident in the scene is gonna be a breeze — or at least way more fun.
Remember you were cast in this movie by the director specifically because no one knows this character as well as you do. You know how they work. What they would wear. What they would do and not do. What feels true to the character.
If your character wouldn’t wear a super kinky leather harness, and you wouldn’t feel confident portraying them, take that off the table. If a simple set of cotton underwear is more in character, let’s go with that.
We’re looking for a genuine, confident performance (expression) — we want to avoid the situation where your outfit screams SEXY but you’re not feeling it.
There will be some outfit options that you’re not quite sure on. Would they be wearing a lacy bra and jeans? Maybe? Then that could be a good option.
The whole time you’re figuring this out, you’re keeping in mind that there’s no one right answer — there’s only what’s most in keeping with the character. Afterall, you’ll give a more confident (and therefore convincing) performance if you go with your gut.
Imagine the butterflies you’d feel if you choose an outfit you’re not quite sure about but can’t rule out — would your character be partially nude? Ask yourself: If I was half naked could I give a convincingly sensual performance? Would it be kinda thrilling to find out? If it works it could really work.
Beyond the clothes
Now take all the thought you put into your outfit and consider what your character would and would not do.
During your session, it’s gonna be a collaboration between you and the director — a mixture of improv and expression and vibing on your part and direction and suggestion on my part.
But ultimately it’ll be up to you — how vulnerable and authentic your performance and what outfits you choose to help you do it.
It’s your movie.
